The Carpet

there are times in life when we see those we love hurting themselves. and true, it is just what we “think”. but we become convinced in our thinking that the course of action that they are pursuing is not a fruitful one. on the contrary, by all accounts it will be quite a painful end. and while we “see” that inevitability, we hope in the place where hope is guarded fiercely, that we are wrong in what we see. nonetheless, we stand as witnesses to their deeds, and more; we are with a better view since we are not blinded by influencing motivations. but what do we “do” in a situation like this?

there is a reasoning which hides behind the barrier described as “acceptance” and “love”. this reasoning also fights against the labels of “judgement” and “intolerance”. yet these are just useful labels wielded around carelessly with scant regard to the reality of what they represent. it is also in my experience, being a believer in Jesus, the Risen Messiah, the Redeemer, and solely on this basis alone, that the actions of many a christian are more readily labelled as “judgement” and “intolerance” rather than “love” and “acceptance”.

if a drug addict is needling him/herself to the point of destruction, do we just stand by and proclaim that we love and accept that person, the way they are, with all their weaknesses, and support them 100%… and not say against what they are doing? and alcoholics. there is no shortage of people ruining their lives and the lives of their families by their drinking habits. do we just accept them because we love them and say nothing against what they’re doing? and those getting divorced, splitting up families, having extra-marital affairs…. do we just say nothing against those things? we must just accept those things as casualties of a hard and difficult life? and i’m not referring to these concepts from a distance either, i’m engaging on a level where someone you love is struggling against these issues. it’s easy to philosophize from a social-psycho textbook and opion-based theory. that has it’s time and place, but what do we actually do?

me, i speak out against it. i disapprove. i encourage to not pursue that course of destruction. but that’s being judgemental. if i stay quiet and sweep it under the carpet, maybe make one or two passing comments which reflect my uneasiness about the situation, then i am showing my love and support and acceptance of the person. and when did that become so twisted?

indeed, many an evil flourishes in silence. and under that carpet where we just sweep so many things away, we choose not to fight for those who do struggle. we choose to support their path to self-destruction because somehow that’s almost easier than actually making a commitment to love them lest you take a stand and get kicked in the teeth for doing so. or maybe we just don’t really believe that what is being done is all that bad anyway, so what’s all the fuss?